A Letter to My Son Leaving for College
For the night the new dorm makes its first weird sound.
Move-in day is loud and built to be photographed. The transition happens around 10 PM that night, when you have driven home, the roommate is asleep, and your son is sitting on a stranger's bed realizing this is where he lives now. A letter from you, in the mail on that day, is the only thing in the room that came from his actual life.
Write it from inside his old bedroom. Pick a date during his first year. We mail it to his dorm address.
What to Write About
The specifics that work
- — What his bedroom looks like the day he left
- — The thing you are not going to be able to do for him anymore
- — A specific reason this place is lucky to have him
- — The thing about college you never told him because you wanted him to find out
- — Permission to call you, no matter what time it is
- — What you are looking forward to about him coming home
- — A story about him when he was small that you have not told in a while
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Start HandwrittenFrequently Asked
When should the letter arrive?
Three options people pick most: move-in day (we mail to his dorm address), the start of his second week (when the real homesickness hits), or finals week of first semester. All work — pick whatever you think will land hardest.
What if he is not the sentimental type?
Most kids leaving for college are not, in public. In a dorm room at 10 PM, alone, every kid is the sentimental type. Write the letter for that version of him. He does not have to acknowledge it.
What should I write about?
What his bedroom looked like this morning. The thing you are not going to be able to do for him anymore that he will figure out. A specific reason this place is lucky to have him. Permission to call you, no matter what time it is.
Should this be from one parent or both?
Either. Some families have one letter from one parent, another from the other. Some do a single joint letter. The dad-to-son letter is its own category — gruffer is fine, specific is required.
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